I really want to dig up my heart.
And see what's happening in there.

My mood get swifty again.
This time, is the pressure i gave myself towards the chinese society camp.
I am so frustrated.
From the begining till now.
I mean, none of the things that had done, really 100% satisfied me.
I might be serious and strict.
It's just i sometimes i cant really breathe well whenever i'm thinking about it.
It might also a reason for yesterday.

I woke up early in the morning.
I didnt make a move.
As my eyes just blinking up the ceiling.
I cant move my body.
All of sudden, i felt my energy had been sucked out.
I lied to my mum that i'm not feeling well. (Sorry mum, i promise i'll be more straight forward you.)
And now, i'm really not feeling well.
Sore throat, a bit flu, less energetic...
This morning at school, i dont feel the inner me connecting to my outter side.
I was playing a show.
Just to persuade myself that i am a-ok.
I guess it didnt work out.
I fell to bed immediately once i reached home.

Listening to music now, really does cured me a bit.
But i still feel tired.
My shoulder is aching.
My head is spinning around.
I cant really concentrate when i'm doing revision.
In the end, i on my computer.
But my mum starts to nag me for not doing housework.
Kinda let myself out by doing housework without serious.

I'm not the one that moody today.
My bro starts to making noise.
Guess he's facing some problems too.

Under one roof now, there's two people that cant breathe well.
I felt sorry to my mum and sis.
It's not that i cant changed my mood now.
I really wish this everything is over.
Please...

Labels: elaine [0323]